Loss to Love-Part 5

Loss to Love

As we walked closer to the botanical gardens, the smell of nature permeated the air. The woody scent of pine mingled with the sharp flowery aroma of flowers. The weather was pretty good, with enough sunlight to make the day seem at least a little bright without being too glaring. Being a weekend, it was no surprise that many residents of Seattle had the same idea to check out the new botanical garden. Just then a small boy, no older than six ran past me, turning and shouting to his parents behind me. I looked down at him and gave him a small smile, to which he returned a beaming grin.

The sound of a camera shutter diverted my attention to the right. I looked as Nick lowered his DSLR smirking at the photo. “Hey, we’re here to take pictures of plants, not human specimens. Besides, that’s my bad side.” I teased, turning to show him my ‘good’ side.

“Hmm seems the same to me. Cocky and big headed.” He said, which I had to give a light punch to his arm. He rubbed his arm playfully before picking his camera up and snapping a couple photos ahead.

I turned to the direction of his shots and saw the first of three domes they had at the garden. I call them domes but they more like huge waves frozen in place. Supposedly, each dome has a specific climate to cater to the different plant species that happen to grow in conditions where Seattle weather didn’t permit.


This story is a work of fiction. All characters are older than 18. They have fun having gay sex. If gay sex is not allowed in your country, you should consider moving to another one. The characters are not having safe sex, please use condoms while exploring your sexuality. As always, I look forward to your comments and suggestions. Thank you for choosing to read my story and I hope you enjoy! You may contact me at gaynerdy2014@gmail.com , also if you have your own story. Please send to this email gaynerdy2014@gmail.com , or click SUBMIT YOUR OWN STORIES! at the top right corner of HOME SCREEN. Also, If you include your name. I will give credit as due, otherwise, it will read as - Read By: Bobby Newberry. THANK YOU for helping to build Gay and Nerdy Archives Library of Erotic Stories and more. Note: We do not own these stories, only share. If you believe this story should not be here. Email gaynerdy2014@gmail.com and explain. If so, we will fix this mistake. Please keep in mind. IT COST MONEY TO KEEP THIS WEBSITE UP AND RUNNING. So with that in mind please consider purchasing something from one of our Adult Toy Stores (By clicking link, or picture below). Win, win for both parties involved. We get financing for website and you get pleasure from your toy purchase. No purchase is too small. Check out one of our stores listed here: Bobo Sex Toys, Sextration.com, and Sex MONKEY Toys. Store and DVD’s. SO WITH THAT IN MIND. UNZIP and ENJOY! Also check out: The Gay Classifieds.


“Whoa, didn’t think they were that big.” I said, looking up at the towering structure.

“Yeah. C’mon, it’s this way.” I followed Nick to the ticket counters to get our tickets. Most parts of the park was open to the public, but the domes required tickets to enter, and seeing that our topic was deserts and Seattle was anything but, we had to get them. Plus, what’s the point in visiting the place if we weren’t going check out the most significant features of the garden.

I stood by Nick as we purchased our tickets, or should I say argued about paying for my ticket. You see I expected to pay for myself, seeing that this was a school project and it won’t be fair to have him pay, but he insisted. We kept arguing till the lady at the counter had to step in.

“Um guys…if we can get this going? There is kind of a line.” She said, as politely as possible. I looked behind me and met the glare of an angry lady behind me who probably thought we were taking too long.

“Yeah tickets for two.” Nick said, putting down the money.

“Thank you.” She said, printing the slips before handing them back to Nick. “You should be glad your boyfriends wants to pay for you.” She smirked at me. I stared at her dumbfounded but Nick pushed me out of the line before I could defend myself.

“Just let it go.” Nick said.

“But I’m still paying for my ticket.” I said.

“Yeah…No.” I rolled my eyes and followed him. “So what do you want to do first? Research or check out this place.”

“Research. I’d hate to overestimate our time and end up not being able to get enough material.” I said, steering him to the direction of the desert dome.

couples_cock_rings_120x240“Can’t argue with that.” I led the way, following the signs that pointed to where I wanted to go. I had to stop a couple times when Nick lagged behind because he stopped to take a few shots. Just our luck that the desert dome had to be the furthest from the entrance and after what felt like half an hour of walking we finally arrived at the entrance to the dome. Made of glass held together by metal struts and wires, the domes looked like huge terrariums. The smallest of the three, the desert dome still towered over us.

The dome entrance consisted of two sets of doors, probably to contain the climate. Stepping foot into the dome for the first time felt like I got transported into another country. In contrast to the cold and humid air of outside, the inside was dry and warm. Not terribly hot, but definitely not temperatures you would experience during October in Seattle.

“This is cool.” I said.

“It’s quite warm actually.” Nick pointed out.

“You know what I mean.” I glared.

“So how do you want to do this?”

“Okay um…I guess you focus on the photos and I’ll take down any notes about the plant species. We’ll go for, two, three species maybe?” I asked Nick for his opinion about the project.

“Yeah three sounds good. I’ll just follow you so lead away. After picking the specimens, just give me a shout and I’ll focus the shots on those.” I nodded and walked down the path, looking at the various plants species and reading the little info on each plant. Nick stayed behind me, snapping away at anything and everything.

We fell into a rhythm as we went along and time passed. I took down notes while Nick took pictures. We were making good progress and an hour later, we had everything we needed. “I guess that’s it. We got all we need.” I said.

“Awesome, so what do you want to do now? We still have time here. Wanna check out the rest of this place?” Nick asked.

“Yeah but first, can we grab something to eat, I’m starving.” Just then, the sun came out from behind a cloud, illuminating the surroundings. Sunlight reflected off the sand and it really looked like a desert at that moment.

“Don’t move!” Nick shouted. I froze where I was; the urgency in his voice had this commanding tone that just made me obey what he said.

“Why? Is something on me?” I said, looking around while moving only my eyes.

The camera shutter diverted my attention once again. “Perfect.” Nick said, lowering his camera. My body relaxed and I moved.

“Dude, I thought you saw something on me.”

“Sorry, the lighting was just too good. See?” He showed me the picture and for a moment I was stunned. The photo was stunning, the sun behind me casted an almost halo effect and the light reflecting off the sand lit up my face nicely. If I didn’t know he just took that, I would have expected some photo editing was done.

“Ok fine, I’m impressed but seriously stop with the pictures. I don’t like my photo taken.” I said.

“Oh really.” Nick said, raising the camera up to his face once more.

“Stop it.” I said, half laughing, putting my hand up to block the camera but still he snapped a shot.

“Wow, for someone who doesn’t like to take photos, you sure are photogenic.” Nick said.

“Shut up. Can we go now? I said I was starving.” I didn’t wait for a reply, instead just walking to the dome exit. Nick ran up behind me and pulled the cap I was wearing off my head, putting it on himself. “Wow thanks man, I totally wanted everyone to see my horrible hat hair.” I said, snatching back my cap.

“You care about your hair too much.” Nick said.

“And you are annoying as hell so I guess that’s fair.” I walked out the dome and realized I had no idea where to go, or if they even served food here.

“This way numb nuts, I saw a stall on the way here.” Nick said leading the way down the path. I followed Nick until we came to this open area with a small hill. Families lay on mats on the hill, having little picnics with the basket of food they brought along. At the base of the hill was one of those pushcarts selling sandwiches and some drinks. I bee lined for the cart, telling Nick to find a spot on the hill. Since Nick paid for my ticket, the least I could do was buy him lunch, if only lunch wasn’t just a sandwich and soda.

After paying for the food, I scanned the area for Nick seeing him near the top of the hill, snapping more shots for his camera. I approached the meathead, throwing his sandwich in is lap, handing him his soda.

“Thanks. Like the spot I picked?” He said, unwrapping his sandwich. I looked over the heads of the people down below us and smiled. The hill wasn’t very big but it had a nice view of the whole garden.

“Good choice.” I said, digging into my sandwich.

“Maybe one day we can have a picnic here too. Seems like a nice place to do so.”

“A picnic? Really? Sounds more like a date to me.” I played, sipping my soda.

“What if it was?” I immediately choked on the soda, the carbonated drink burning my windpipe. I coughed violently, trying to rid the liquid in my airway. “Whoa whoa I was joking.”

“Not funny.” I croaked out, my voice coarse.

“Wow you must not like the idea of dating me.” He joked and I just glared at him. Here I was suffering and he still had the nerve to joke. Quite the contrary actually, I wouldn’t mind dating Nick, if he wasn’t straight I mean. He just caught me off guard.

“Don’t joke like that again.” I scolded. Okay so maybe it was more than just catching me off guard. I was lonely enough as it was and Nick teasing me like that wasn’t helping. We just talked about it in the car ride here and already he is back making me feel lonelier.

“C’mon man, I was joking.” He defended himself.

“And I’m telling you to stop it. I thought I made myself clear back in the car that I don’t like to be reminded about my sad love life.” I snapped back, a little hostility in my tone. The smile on Nick’s face fell when he realized how much I was upset by his statement. He opened his mouth to, I assume, apologize again, but then shut it. Smart boy. I started chewing on my sandwich again looking out to the garden. We settle into a silence after that, I stared out and kind of got lost in my thoughts.

Nick knocked me out of my trance when he patted me on the elbow. “Shall we continue or do you wanna stay here.” He asked, a little quietly, like he was afraid he was going to make me angrier.

“Continue.” I said, getting up and collecting our trash and throwing them in the bin before heading on. I led the way again, Nick trailing behind like a sad dog. Once again he had to make me feel guilty. Yeah he kind of made me angry but I really shouldn’t have snapped like that. I did realize I was being kind of bipolar. I slowed down enough so that he could catch up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap like that.”

“No don’t apologize. I fucked up…again. Earlier in the car I did it and then again just now.” He said.

“I guess we’re both fucked up then. You’re not completely to blame. I guess sometimes I’m just a little too sensitive. Call it PMS or whatever. It was a joke. I didn’t need to flare up like that.”

“We seem to argue a lot these days huh. Kinda makes me fell like maybe being friends wasn’t the way we were supposed to be.” Nick said.

“So you wanna end this? You know, go back to the way things were.”

“What? No! I didn’t mean that. What I’m trying to say is that maybe because of our history, we kinda don’t wanna lose to each other. Maybe that’s why we always argue. So how about this, we’ll both agree that we’ll not take everything each other say to heart too much. Just live in the moment. We joke and shit but we both know that that’s it, joking.” Nick said.

“That sounds fair, I’ll try to be less whiny about dating on my part. And if I ever go all sensitive bitch again, I hereby give you the right to slap me.”

“Slap that cute face? Never.” Nick cooed, like he was talking to a child, pinching my cheek as he said so.

I punched him in the arm. “And I give myself the right to hit you when you pull something like that.” Nick chuckled sweetly putting his arm around my body and pulling me into his side. Never have I had my ribcage crushed by a side hug but there was always a first time. I poked him in the side, which made him release me instantly, straightening the shirt I was wearing, which I just remembered was Nick’s and not mine.

We walked and talked, taking pictures along the way. We moved at a leisurely pace seeing that we had gathered what we needed for the project. Eventually we made our way to the rainforest dome, which was the largest of the three structures. Like the desert dome, walking into it transported you to another place. This one however was extremely humid as opposed to the dry atmosphere of the desert dome. Warm and moist, it was a matter of minutes before a layer of sweat formed across my skin.

“Wow it’s warm.” Nick said, stating the obvious.

“C’mon let’s look around quick and get out of this heat ASAP.” I said pulling him up the path. The climate of the dome wasn’t my favorite type of conditions but the flora was definitely the most diversed. I’d hate to be the group whose topic was rainforests. Nick was caught between walking fast and taking some amazing shots of the plants.

As we continued on the path, the sight of an enormous rock formation came into view. Towering over everything else in the dome it was the main attraction. At the top, little walkways jutted out from the rock face, tiny silhouettes of people paced along them. “Oh I want to go up there. The view must be amazing.” I said.

“Up there? Really?” I turned and saw Nick looking at the skywalk with some trepidation.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Um…nothing nevermind.” I gave Nick an incredulous stare, raising an eyebrow in question. “It’s nothing. C’mon.”

Nick pulled me towards the rock structure. It was a small hike up a trail to get to the treetop walk as it was called, winding around the structure and through the middle of it at one point. As we ascended the structure, the temperature fell, a cool artificial breeze blowing. I sighed with content when the cool wind touched my sweaty skin, instantly cooling me down. Nick looked a mix of relief and constipation. “What’s wrong?” I asked

“Nothing. The breeze is nice.” He squeaked out but he looked paler than usual, contradicting his words. “Just carry on.” I followed his instruction although a little worried about him. Maybe he wasn’t feeling too good.

Finally we reached the top and I walked to the rail, looking down at the entire dome before me. Down below, people walking along looked like insects scampering across the ground. The air, still humid but a lot cooler brushed against my heat flushed skin, giving me a much needed rejuvenation. “It’s beautiful.” I said, turning to my right, expecting to see Nick there, but he wasn’t. I looked around, trying to spot him and my eyes fell on him some distance back by the rock face. He was looking in my direction and I waved him over, but all he did was give me a weak smile and mouthed ‘nevermind’. Confused I walked towards him, closing the distance between us. “What’s wrong? The view is amazing.”

“It’s okay. You enjoy it. I’ll just stay here.” I could hear the nervousness of his voice now. The way he kept his eyes focused on the glass ceiling was extra peculiar. I looked down his arm and his hand was tightly fastened onto the rail, his grip so tight till his knuckles were white. I looked down and the view through the metal mesh landing gave me slight vertigo.

Then it hit me.

The nerves. The tight grip. The way he diverted his view. His trepidation. Nick was afraid of heights. I smirked and folded my arms, watching Nick in such torment. It was definitely a new side to him I had never seen before. The tough guy did have a weakness. “Nick Preston is afraid of heights? Oh this is too good.” I laughed which earned me a glare.

“Shut up. I’m not.” He argued, maybe trying to save his male ego.

“Oh? So I guess you can release your vice grip on the rail now then.” Nick’s eyes turned to my face and I waited for him to move. Slowly he released his grip, but without a solid support, his fingers started to tremble.

“See?” He said, acting triumphant but his shaky hands betrayed the truth.

Feeling a surge of evil coursing through me, I did what I’m sure gave Nick a heart attack. I wrapped my arm onto his elbow, locking us together. Before Nick could react, I pulled him with me to the edge of the landing. He tried resisting at first, but his jelly arms and legs didn’t have the strength they normally possessed. I held him by the rail and Nick was as close to hyperventilating as I had ever seen him.

“Just relax.” I said, moving his hand to the rail, which he immediately gripped. His eyes however, were still locked to the ceiling. “Look at me.”

“I…” Was all he could choke out.

“C’mon. It’s nothing. I’m right here. Just look down and you’ll see how beautiful this place is.” I said. He closed his eyes and tilted his head down, keeping them shut.

“There I’m looking down.” He said, obviously trying to be cheeky.

“Just open them.” He sighed and fluttered his eyes open. Tentatively looking further and further down, I could almost feel the tension that was radiating off of him. Eventually he saw the scenery that was laid before him. “Was that so bad?”

“Yes.” He deadpanned which I had to laugh.

“Well at least you can now see what you were missing. I mean this is beautiful.” I said, breathing in the air.

giant_dildos_120x240“Yeah.” I turned and Nick was looking at me, before quickly darting his gaze away. I raised an eyebrow at him but he returned to look at the ceiling. “Can we go now?” I shook my head chuckling, before pulling him away and down back to solid ground. I swear if we weren’t in public, I’m sure Nick would have kissed the ground. After that heart thumping experience, Nick suggested we head home to cover some stuff for the project. Feeling that perhaps I had put him through enough for the day, agreed and soon enough we were heading home in his car.

The car ride home was a lot faster than the ride from, partly due to the better traffic. It was just before 5pm when we pulled into Nick’s driveway. We got out and gathered our stuff, preparing for a long night of work. “Your house or mine?” Nick asked, and I couldn’t help but think about how under different circumstances, that line would mean something totally different.

“Hmm, well my dad is home,” I said, spotting his car in it’s usual spot. “But he won’t bother us.”

“And I have Steph, who will bother us every few minutes.” We looked at each other for a moment. “Your house.”

“My house.” I said at the same time, both of us coming to the same conclusion of using my house. I led the way to my front door, unlocking it. The TV was turned on in the living room, the sound from it echoing through the otherwise silent house. “Dad I’m home. My friend’s over too.” I announced climbing up the stairs. I was halfway up them when my dad appeared from the kitchen doorway instead of the living room, surprising me.

Nick caught sight of my dad and gave a small smile. “Evening Mr. Langston.” All my dad did was grunt and carried on into the living room. I rolled my eyes and made my way to my room. I threw my notes onto my desk, stripping the cap I had on from my head, running my fingers through my hair. Nick closed the door behind him, setting his bag onto the floor. “Your dad’s a man of few words.”

“That’s an understatement. More like a man of no words.” I walked to my dresser pulling out a new t-shirt. I stripped off the top I was wearing, pulling my fresh shirt over my head. “Before I forget. You want me to wash it? I can hand it back to you after and you can return mine too.”

“Um…I’m sorry what did you say.” Nick shook his head, probably coming out of a daydream. I ignored it and repeated the question. “You looked good in it. How about you keep it.”

“What? Dude c’mon I’m not gonna take your shirt.”

“Just keep it. I’ve got three more just like it.”

“I don’t care if you’ve got a hundred of them, I’m not taking your shirt.”

“Ugh whatever. Then wash it first. I’ll get it back and return yours at the same time.” He said, walking over to my bed and flopping down. I rolled my eyes, throwing the shirt into my laundry pile. “We still haven’t decided what we’re gonna do for the project.”

“Poster?” I suggested.

“Too normal.”

“PowerPoint slide show.”

“Too boring.”

“Well I guess we could do a video.” I tried. I mean that was what I was planning to do but I didn’t want to sound pushy jumping straight to my idea without his input. It was after all OUR project.

“Yep we are.” He replied without so much as a blink.

“You sure come to decisions fast.”

“Actually I was already expecting to do a video. The question was kind of rhetorical. I mean seriously, why would you even suggest anything other than a video? That’s supposed to be your area of expertise.” He smirked, an expression he seemed to regularly show me.

“Well sorry for wanting to get some input about our project before jumping to conclusions.”

“Cute. So how should we go about this?” We discussed what we planned to do and finally decided on a short documentary kind of thing. So we got started with the script, drafting what we wanted to say. Ms. Han did say the content was the important thing so we focused on that. I wanted to say we thought long and hard, but we didn’t. With everything we got at the garden, everything came out pretty easily. Throw in some online research we did and viola, script done.

“You should record the voiceover. Your voice is easier on the ears.” I said, getting up to my computer, connecting my microphone and setting up everything.

“Aw you like my voice?” He cooed, sitting on the bed and flipping through the photos he took at the garden on his camera.

“I never said that.”

“You didn’t have to.”

“Whatever man. C’mon let’s get this done with.” I said, beckoning him to the desk. He stood up, setting his camera down on the bed and walking over to me. I pushed him into my desk chair, laying the completed script in front of him. “Speak clearly. This is just a little draft to make editing the video easier. We’ll record the final one and make any tweaks once the video is done.”

“Aye aye captain.” Nick said, giving a small salute. I rolled my eyes as I hit record. One run through was all it took and like that, we were done for the day.

“Okay I guess that’s it for today. I’m exhausted. Don’t forget to email me the pictures and videos you took. I’ll need them to get started on that video.” I asked, picking our stuff from the floor. Nick started packing his stuff, and helped tidy up a little.

“Yeah no problem. I’ll drop by Monday to help you with the video too.” Nick said, throwing his backpack across his shoulder.

“See ya then.”

“See ya.” He said, exiting my room and closing my door. I took a seat on my bed, leaning back into my pillow. I was exhausted and the feel of my pillow just made me want to go to bed. We completed a lot today and I guess you could call that a very productive day. I lay there for five minutes before I realized I should be getting washed up. I moved my hand across my bed before my hand came into contact with something hard.

I looked down to see Nick camera sitting on my bed. Great. The idiot forgot his camera. I picked up the camera, turning the thing on. I wanted to see the shots he took to get an idea of how to make the video. The first photo that came up was the one he took of me in the dome, the one he showed me. I examined the picture and smiled. True enough it was a seriously good picture. I don’t think I had ever looked so good in a picture before. I made a mental note to get Nick to send me that one too. I flicked to the next photo and it was the one he took straight after, where I had a hand up obscuring the view of my face, but only a fraction of it.

Just then there was a knock on my door and it opened a pinch and Nick’s head popped in.

“Hey I think I left my camera here.” He said. I threw my legs off the side on the bed and stood up.

“Yeah I was just looking through…” I was cut off when the camera was snatched from my fingers. I looked up shocked by his rudeness but was even more caught off guard by the look on his face. His face was filled with anger.

“What did you see?” He shouted, the same time grabbing my shirt and pushing me against the wall. My back collided with a thud, which knocked the wind out of my lungs. “What did you see?” He repeated once more through clenched teeth. Now I’ve been in similar positions with Nick before but I had never actually been scared. This time I was terrified. The look on his face was pure rage, rage I had never seen from him before.

“Nothing. Just the picture you took of me just now. The one you showed me.” I squeaked out. “Nothing else I swear.”

Nick stared at me for a while, his anger emanating off his body. I stood completely still, feeling like if I moved, it would only provoke him more. I just stared into his eyes, like a deer in headlights.

Finally I felt his grip on my shirt loosen. His fist opened up and his palm rested on my chest, still applying some pressure against me, effectively pinning me to my wall. He could probably feel my heart pounding in my chest but I was too scared to move. Slowly he closed his eyes and I felt his anger dissipate, very slowly. He opened them his eyes and resumed his stare on me, but this time I saw something I didn’t expect to see in his eyes. Fear.

I felt his hand travel up to my neck and for a moment, I thought he was going to strangle me. I was going to die in my own home.

My fears were unwarranted though as his hand continued further up to my face. He grabbed my face, my chin in his palm, a thumb on one cheek and his fingers on the other. He squeezed his hand, forcing me to pucker up till I probably looked like a fish. He brought his face closer to mine, reducing the distance between us. I couldn’t tell if he was going to kill me, or kiss me. I had a combination of both fear and, something I didn’t expect, lust swelling inside me. He stopped his face millimeters from mine, his eyes boring into mine, never once straying. I could feel his breath tickling my lips. The whole thing was strangely erotic, and I would have jumped him if I weren’t so scared.

“Don’t. Touch. My. Camera. Again.” He punctuated each word with such conviction I found myself involuntary nodding. His eyes darted down for a split second before coming back up to my eyes. He released his hand but didn’t pull his face away. It should have been uncomfortable but I was surprised at how comfortable it actually was. I was expecting it to feel awkward with his face so close to mine but it wasn’t. Instead, I was turned on.

Finally after what felt like forever, Nick broke his stare and dropped his head down onto my shoulder and the only thing I could think was how he felt so right in the crook of my neck. His neck was so close to my face that I could smell him, and boy did he smell good. The whole thing didn’t help with the lust situation.

“I’m sorry.” He muttered, so soft I almost didn’t catch it.

“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have looked through you camera. I was a total invasion of privacy.” I said, trying to resist the urge to wrap my arms around him. Eventually he lifted his head off my shoulder and took a few steps back. I was relieved as well as disappointed that the distance between us had returned.

“I think I should go.” He said, turning around and leaving without another word. I watched as my door shut and footsteps descended down the stairs. I raised my hand to my face, feeling the area where Nick’s hand was. I could still feel the heat of his fingers on my cheeks, like imprinting his hand on my face.

pumpedup_120x240Just then my phone rang with a text. I walked to my desk, picking up the phone. It was a text from Nick. All it said was, “Sorry :(” I felt like pulling my hair out. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Nick could be such a pain sometimes, and yet he was so sweet other times. Not to mention the emotions that I felt just moments ago. It was weird, like not just lust. It was different, and I had inkling as to why.

“Fuck. I can’t like Nick,” I said aloud. I started to freak out, for reasons I didn’t understand. How could I like Nick, he was a friend. Yeah, a really hot, really sweet guy and…oh shit I do like him. I needed to talk to someone about this. DEAN.

I raised my phone, about to dial his number but as if we had telepathy, my phone rang and Dean’s name displayed on caller ID. “Dean, I’m freaking out man. Freaking out.”

“What happened to a simple hello?”

“Ain’t nobody got time for that man. I have a crisis going on.”

“Okay what’s so bad? Your hair has split ends?”

“I’m serious man. This is no small deal. I think…I think I like Nick.”

“Yeah it’s okay to like your friends.” I rolled me eyes. Sometimes Dean could be such a bimbo it wasn’t even funny.

“I don’t just mean like. I think I like him.”

“You WHAT!!!” I pulled the phone away from my ear, the shout hurting my eardrum. “Dude, isn’t he dating Kate Benson?”

I forgot that Dean had been pretty much out of the loop in regards to the happenings of Jameson High. “Old news man. They broke up a while back.”

“Holy shit, they broke up? How can they break up?”

“Dude they broke up. Get over it. Can we get back to my problem now?” I said, trying to redirect the topic of the conversation.

“Sorry but what do you want me to say?” He asked.

“Tell me how to deal with this. He is fucking straight and I’m thinking about him in ways that I shouldn’t be thinking about him.”

“Well first of all I can’t tell you how to deal with this because, news flash my friend, I’m not gay, and secondly, eew. I don’t need to know what you picture yourself doing with Mr. quarterback.”

“You’re not helping at all.” I deadpanned.

“Oh I’m sorry. I just called to see how my best bud was doing and he asks me for life advice. Please excuse my lack of good suggestions. Besides, does he even like cock?” I cringed at his crude way of phrasing his question.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so, but…” I stopped.

“But what?”

“I don’t know, he’s sending all these mixed signals and it’s all very confusing. Argh why can’t relationships be easy.” I said, crashing into my bed in exasperation.

“Is it worth it?”

“What is?”

“Do you see a relationship with Nick worth it. Yeah relationships aren’t easy but is Nick worth the trouble? I can’t tell you whether or not he likes you like that, but he likes you enough to befriend you. Is the possibility of losing Nick as a friend worth trying for a serious relationship with him? If the answer is no, then your answer is simple, just stay friends. You eventually realize that it was only a case of schoolboy infatuation and move on with your life after. But if the answer is yes, then that’s where things get a little more complicated.”

“How is it that you can be so dumb, and yet so smart at the same time.” I asked. Dean really did surprise me on occasions, this being one of them.

“It’s a gift. So is it worth it?” I thought about the question. Nick was an awesome friend and I didn’t want to lose him as that. But then again he was so sweet at times and I can almost imagine us being together.

“I don’t know.”

“Well them maybe it’s time you figured that out. Starting with whether he likes you or not.”

“Well that’s the problem now isn’t it. I mean one minute he’s holding my face within inches of mine to the point I can feel his breath, and another minute he’s complaining to me about the girl he…” I stopped, realizing what I was saying. I groaned and covered my eyes with my free hand. “Shit I’m so stupid.”

“Tell me something I don’t know. What’s the problem now?” Dean asked.

“He doesn’t like me. He has a crush on some girl in school. Shit how could I forget that.”

“So…”

“So I guess that’s it. I’m not gonna pursue this.” I said, coming to my conclusion.

“But you want to don’t you.” Dean said, more a statement than a question. I said nothing. Yeah I do, but we don’t always get what we want. Besides, I’m pretty sure that if I just let this go, I think I would, like Dean said, get over this crush.

“I’ll survive this. I hope.”

Written By: Music Freak

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